LOURDS was at the MERCURY LOUNGE on tues. the 11th. As usual she didn't fail to mesmerize the virgins. As you've might have noticed I need my LOURDS fix regularly so that I can tolerate some of the crap that's out there and remind myself that there is a future in r&r. After that I ran over to MANITOBA'S to catch the DETOX DARLINGS, but I wasn't fast enough and I missed them. I had some friends with me from L.I. and they wanted some "N.Y. nitelife" so we went over to SIN SIN on2ave. It was a 1 year anniversary party in the LEOPARD LOUNGE and the place was packed. PORN ROCK was the featured performers and I do mean performers. Led by lead singer PINK SNOW ( who just happens to look like a porn star), they plowed thru a wild set that included PINK removing her top and using her "twins" to hold the mike. The crowd really got into it and she managed to get a girl from the crowd to hold her mike for her as she proceeded to relieve her mike stand of all her clothes. After the set , hanging out backstage with the band was almost, correct that, it was wilder than the show. Pink was constantly allowing the "twins" to be free as the Jack Daniels was flowing quite freely. Her bass player was wearing a leather jockstrap w/zipper and when one girl doubted his "reality ", he let her see if the zipper worked. Well the snap broke open and she was hit in the face with "reality".

On thurs, the 13th KIPP ELBAUM, JOEY ZERO, RON RESCIGNO, BURNY WHITE and FRANK WOOD (me!) put on a monster benefit for the Christmas fund for the children of the FIREFIGHTERS who lost their lives saving others in the WTC Disaster, at CBGB's (THANK YOU HILLY for donating the space). There were 31 bands scheduled starting at 7pm. Starting with DANNY KELLY and his band (Karen, Kristen, Bob, Mike and Dave), Lisa Ludwig and BLACK FLAMINGO (Sharon and Miwa), and the HUDSON DUSTERS (Kevin, Danny, Bill, ED and big Bill Thompson from the SENDERS) and then JANA PERI BAND (Jana, Rick, Jim, and Nikki) filled out the first hour and we were just getting started.

The legendary DAVID PEEL (poet/writer/musician/cannabis activist) did his usual eclectic commentary on the state of the world thru his eyes. Then it was back to the music with MIKE DUTTON and his friend Dave, leading into OSCAR AND THE PIDGIN SISTERS (Scott, Heidi, Simona and Vicky) and SUCKERS LUCK ( Danny, Artie, Don and Billy Ficca from TELEVISION). JAMES CHANCE and Billy again on drums ended the second hour.

STARFISH (Dave and JEZO) started the 3rd hour, followed by RUBY and the REDNECKS (Steve Greenfield, Johnnny, Suzie, Ron and Paul). TYPHOON FERRI (Aaron, Tyler and Mark) led into a personal favorite of mine.

JOY RYDER and the NY RHYTHM ALL-STARS (Yasayuki, Stu"the PROFESSOR" Newman, Angelo Olivieri, Dave and Steve Greenfield) got the crowd to their feet with their infectious r&b grooves to start the 4th hour, which led to the rockabilly of the BLIND PHAROAHS (Bill, Steve JIm and Sean). Then it was time for one of the original bands from the early days of CBGB's: THE FLESHTONES (Peter, Ken , Kieth, Bill and,again, Steve Greenfield), and they haven't lost anything since the days of yore.

GRAVEYARD SLUT (Bill, Cameron, Dunji and Mike) led off the 5th hour with straight ahead driving r&r and we were cooking now . CHARM SCHOOL (Tina, Steve, Yoav and Frank) was next and then came SHIRLEY TEMPLE OF DOOM (Jeff, Mat and Billy) and we had reached the halfway mark.

The STAR SPANGLES (Ian, Tom, Nick and Joe) started the 6th hour and it was the only time I had to threaten a band with the hook for overstaying their slot, but they're young and they'll learn. Then came the band most people (and all the firemen ) came to see THE BULLIES w/Bobby Steele. Joe, Walt, Beertruck and Mike played their hearts out. This was a great set despite the fact that binasshole had taken their fellow band member and our favorite firefighter away from us. We're gonna miss you John, but we'll never forget! It was rough but the DROSSELLS (Li, Burny, Danny, Arwan and JJ) more than managed to keep up the spirit of the nite.

AFTERLIFE (Tristen, Charlie, Chris and Joe) broght us into the the 7th hour. The next act I was waiting for all nite, they drove up from North Carolina to show their support , JAKE's BLUES (Jake, Jason and Steve), but gremlins attacked his guitar and even with all these bands he was the ONLY left-handed guitarist of the nite! The KRETINS (Ron, Kevin and Nikki) took the stage next and chased those gremlins away. Then HEADCASE (Ann-Marie and Danny) finished off the hour.

The CARVELS (LynnBomb, Bryan, Sean and Steve) took the stage, to lead off the 8th hour, but the gremlins had returned,so after 1 song they let THE SOCIETY OF FACES (TJ, AL and Dicky) take over. The gremlins were defeated or so we thought, and Jake took another shot at it . Those gremlins were having a feast with his guitar so it was up to the INNCORRIGABLES (Kieth, Michael, Kevin and John) to defeat them( after first defeating their own inner gremlins backstage.) They were more than up to the task. NO PLACE TO PISS (Joe, Bomb, Kieth and Joey Zero!) followed them and I was amazed that a) Joey Zero had a guitar, b) he could make it play, and c) he was that focused for , what , 15 minutes.!?! Well that could only mean the end was coming and ANIMAL CLINIC ( Mike, Sioban and Paul) was it. We only went over by 12 MINUTES!?!! I want to thank everyone who made this show a success and I also want to apologize for any misspellings. THANK YOU!!!

There is no rest for the weary , so on Fri. I was at KENNY's CASTAWAY to see WOUNDED. That's T.J.Jordan from LOURDS' band along with NIck and Steve. They were joined during the first set by PAT TRAVERS, and then went on to do a second set. You don"t get many bands that do 2 sets , especially when they are that great.

Saturday was off to the CUTTING ROOM to see two bands I've known for some time, that never fail to please, THE BRILLIANT MISTAKES, and DUNCAN. The room was packed and they kept up to standard. They were followed by GRETA GAINES but she lost my attention so I moved on.

Tues. the 18th saw a Stemway show at TRIBECA BLUES featuring BLUE NUMBER 9 , RIPE and LISA BOULET and friends. Stephanie led BN9 thru some funky grooves but after their set I had to leave. Nothing against the other bands who were good but I hadto go to the upper west side to see FOLK FICTION at TRIAD. Thera led Steve, Greg and George thru a theatrical set that can be matched by few. They will be at TRIAD every 3rd Fri of each month starting in January, catch them while you can.

It's time to go, I'll try and do one more column this year if not, Have a WONDERFUL and HAPPY HOLIDAY season. Take care,

FRANK WOOD

WOOD'S PICKS
THE FAMOUS 'WOODIES' RATING SYSTEM: = 'heard about it' = 'heard about it..from a reliable source' = 'I...Myself actually reccomend it' = 'You better not miss this' = ' Contact me, I may be able to get you in, it will be soldout"
Dec 19th	BLACK FLAMINGO at IZZY's (76th Street @ 2nd Ave) 9pm
Dec 20th	"TAXI DRIVER" and "RAGING BULL" at the FILM FORUM ( Houston St) HURRY UP OFFENSE at LUNA LOUNGE (Ludlow st) 9:30pm
Dec 22nd	JOY RYDER and the NY RHYTHM ALL-STARS at the CUTTING ROOM (East 24th St & Broadwauy) 9pm
Dec 25th	MERRY CHRISTMAS
Dec 26th	MIMI ROCK at ARLENE GROCERY ( 95 Stanton st ) 8pm MOLDY PEACHES at the SIDEWALK ( 6th Sst & Avenue A) midnite
Dec 27th	LOURDS at the CONTINENTAL (Essex and Houston Sts) 10:30pm

That should keep you busy. Have a HAPPY HOLIDAYS and take care,

FRANK WOOD